Careless Talk and The Triple Filter

Up North they have a wonderful expression about ‘opening your mouth and letting your belly rumble!’ In other words, simply letting our mouths run away with you. It is easy to talk and sometimes when perhaps we are nervous or short of a good conversational starter we can take the easy route and spread a little gossip! A juicy morsel of unchecked and unconfirmed mischief that savours scandal at the price of truth and reputation.

In ancient Greece, Socrates was held in high esteem for his wisdom and great knowledge. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher in the market and taking him aside spoke in a conspiratorial manner…

“Do you know what I just heard about Demetrius?”

“Hold on a minute,” Socrates replied. “Before telling me anything I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Triple Filter Test.”

“Triple filter?”

“That’s right,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?”

“Well, no,” said the man, “I have actually only just heard about it and...”

 “All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?”

The man looked slightly shocked. “Not good exactly, on the contrary…”

“So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about him, but you’re not certain if it’s true. You may still pass the test though, because there’s one filter left: the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?”

“Well, not really…” admitted the man.

“So,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, then why tell it to me at all?”

For that the man had simply no answer and he turned and walked away!

Gossip is corrosive! It eats into character, dissolves reputation and removes trust. As the motto from WW2 reminds us:

‘Careless talk costs lives’

Let’s learn to be wise in all our conversations and apply the triple filter: is it true, good or even useful? If not then just keep schtum. As you go through life there will be many opportunities to keep silent - make the most of all of them!